Life after Divorce: New Chapter, New Things, & New Friends
Starting fresh after a divorce can feel daunting, but it also opens up exciting opportunities for personal growth, new experiences, and the chance to meet new people.
Here are some tips on trying new things and making new friends during this transformative time:
1. Embrace the Opportunity for Self-Discovery
- Rediscover Interests: What obbies or activities did you put aside during your marriage? Now’s your chance to revisit them or explore new ones. Whether it’s painting, hiking, cooking, or a new sport, discovering something on your own terms can bring joy and fulfillment.
- Learn Something New: Sign up for a class (art, language, or even something tech-related) to spark your creativity and expand your skills. Learning in a group setting can also lead to meeting like-minded people.
2. Join Social or Interest-Based Groups
- Meetups: Websites like meetup.com allow you to find groups based on shared interests—everything from book clubs and hiking groups to board game nights or cooking classes.
- Clubs and Organizations: Join clubs or social organizations that interest you, whether it’s a fitness class, a community volunteer group, or a professional networking event.
- Classes & Workshops: Taking a cooking class, fitness class, or even a public speaking seminar can be a fun way to meet people.
3. Leverage Online Communities
- Dating Apps: If you’re open to dating, apps like Bumble, Tinder, or Hinge offer opportunities to meet new people, but you can also use them to make friends (many apps have friend-finding modes).
- Onward & Online Forums: Onward and other online platforms offer a place to gather and discuss from the comfort of your own home—find communities where you can connect with others and share experiences.
4. Take Up Volunteer Work
- Give Back: Volunteering for causes you care about not only feels rewarding, but it’s also a way to meet people who share your values and interests. Whether it’s helping at a local food bank or participating in environmental cleanups, it’s a great way to connect.
- Charity Events: Participate in charity runs, galas, or community events—these often attract people who are interested in giving back and can offer opportunities to network and form connections.
5. Attend Networking or Social Events
- Local Events: Check local listings for social events, like local markets, art exhibitions, or community fairs. Even if you’re not sure you’ll meet people, you might be surprised by the connections you make.
- Professional Networking: If you’re looking to expand your career or meet people with similar professional interests, attending industry conferences, workshops, or networking meetups can be a great way to make new acquaintances.
6. Nurture Existing Relationships
- Reconnect with Old Friends: Divorce can sometimes cause people to drift away from old friends. Now is a good opportunity to reconnect with people you’ve lost touch with—whether it’s an old friend from school or a colleague you haven’t seen in a while. Also see tips below for making new friends.
- Strengthen Family Ties: If you have family members you’ve grown apart from, or cousins you haven’t seen in years, reaching out can be a way to rebuild important connections.
7. Try New Fitness or Wellness Activities
- Join a Gym or Sports League: Many gyms offer group classes, which can be a social environment to meet people while staying active. Or, try joining a recreational sports league (e.g., soccer, volleyball, or tennis) where you can bond with others while getting in shape.
- Yoga or Meditation: These activities often attract communities focused on well-being and mindfulness. Many yoga studios or meditation groups offer opportunities to meet others in a supportive and calm environment.
8. Explore Solo Travel and/or Group Adventures
- Travel Solo or in Groups: Going on a solo trip or joining group tours (like hiking groups, adventure travel, or art tours) can be a great way to meet people while experiencing something new.
- Short Getaways: Even a weekend getaway or a day trip to a nearby city or town can lead to meeting new people and getting out of your routine (more on this below).
9. Seek Therapy or Support Groups
- Counseling: If you’re finding it hard to adjust or cope with your emotions, therapy can help you heal from the divorce and develop strategies for building a new social life.
- Divorce Support Groups: Many communities, such as Onward, offer support groups for individuals going through divorce, where you can meet people who understand your experience and make meaningful connections.
+ Tips for Making New Friends
- Be Open: Approach new connections with an open heart and curiosity. Friendships often blossom when you’re genuinely interested in getting to know someone.
- Be Patient: It takes time to build meaningful friendships. Don’t rush the process—let relationships develop naturally.
- Stay Positive: A positive attitude can be magnetic and will help attract people who appreciate your outlook on life.
Be Open to Socializing Outside Your Comfort Zone
- Initiate Plans: Don’t be afraid to initiate plans with new acquaintances. Invite a neighbor to coffee, ask a colleague to lunch, or invite someone from a class to a weekend activity.
- Host Your Own Event: Organize a small dinner party, BBQ, or casual get-together with people you’ve met. It’s an opportunity to nurture new friendships and show that you’re open to connecting with others.
Practice Self-Compassion and Patience
- Take It Slow: Don’t rush the process of making new friends or trying new things. It may take time to feel comfortable in new environments, and that’s okay.
- Be Kind to Yourself: It’s natural to feel uncertain, especially if you’re trying things outside your comfort zone. Be patient with yourself and give yourself credit for making the effort.
Build New Routines
- Frequent New Places: Establish new routines that take you to places you haven’t been before, like a coffee shop, bookstore, or park. These places are low-pressure environments to strike up conversations.
- Solo Activities: Whether it’s visiting museums, going for walks, or having lunch at a new restaurant, spending time alone in public places can increase your confidence and might lead to meeting new people.